February 9

It's done! Today we sold my old car. It's funny - I've had that thing since it was brand-new in 2007, when our lives were completely different. When we bought it, I was working as a teacher and we were still a year away from even thinking about having babies. Still, Chris and I were planning long-term, and we bought the Camry hoping it would be our "Babymobile". It definitely served its purpose, and I am thankful to see that it went to a family who will appreciate it like we did.

We spent most of our morning handling the sale, and I even got to drive my new van for the first time! After everything was done, Chris and I took the little ones out for a celebratory brunch. It was Eli's first trip to a restaurant, and he slept the whole time. What a good baby.

Eli also slept through the whole car-sale thing, and most of the afternoon. Still, he is slowly starting to have more alert phases. It seems like he is only awake an hour or two total each day, which is part of the preemie thing, so I'm trying to take advantage of the extended sleepiness!

I am finally starting to feel better; I realized last night that I may have finally turned a corner. My swelling and pain are down significantly, even if Eli still can't nurse on the affected side. I'm just happy to finally see some improvement! When Caleb came home from school, I was up and doing things, which hasn't been the case for the past week. 

A friend from MOPS brought dinner, and Chris worked to put that together while I wrote thank-you notes and helped Caleb with his homework.

Math practice. Caleb rocks.

Daisy watched Caleb, Eli slept in his swing, and Lily... well, she had the best spot in the house! 

It's amazing the difference it makes to have Chris home when Caleb gets home from school. Our evenings are calm, unrushed, and pleasant. I suppose the whole "friends bringing dinner" thing also helps the dynamic, but still. If only we were independently wealthy and Chris didn't have to work! Or, if only Chris could leave work at 4:00 every day. Sadly, that's not the case, and real life resumes on Thursday. 

Chris has been able to take two weeks vacation after the birth of each of our children, and with the first three we really only needed a week of that. After a week, I felt confident enough to send Chris back for half-days, then short days... This time, it's a whole new story. I wish I could keep him home just a few more days, because I'm so afraid I won't be fully functional by then. But then, maybe I will be. I'm improving rapidly, so I'll keep praying to be back at 100% by Thursday. Feel free to join me in that prayer!

February 8

Today the sun shined and Chris may very well have sold my old car.

It was a good day.

He's set to close on the sale tomorrow morning; if it all works out, it will be just wonderful. Really, it will be the first thing in the past two weeks that has been simple and complication-free.

In the meantime, we snuggled.

Can you tell how tired I am?

I personally love the background image of Eli's bottle (just emptied of pumped breastmilk, because we're still supplementing his nursing due to that stupid mastitis) sitting atop my giant hospital jug of water. I used to joke that after two home births, the only thing I missed about giving birth in a hospital was the giant cup with the looong bendy straw. Now I have two of those cups, and I'm pretty sure I earned both of them.

While Eli slept, I stumbled upon this sight:

Caleb, reading to Daisy. It was just a little book he had "made" by stapling pages together at school, but he was actually reading it to her and it was the sweetest thing ever. Caleb is still at a stage where he's pretty shy about reading in front of people, so it was heart warming to see him reading to his sister.

I also love how focused Daisy is on what Caleb is reading. I can almost see the wheels turning in her head... "If Caleb can do this, then I bet I can, too!" She's totally trying to figure out the whole reading thing.

Chris went out to show the car to a couple people while Daisy, Lily, and Eli napped. That left Caleb, who was bored, bored, bored. Finally, he asked to call Grandma, and invited her to come over to play with him.

Surprisingly, she agreed. Even better, she brought Grandpa along, too! They played with the kids outside for quite a while. Eli and I even came out to soak up some sunshine.

Then Chris gave the big kids an early bath to wash off all of the sand from the sandbox. Once she was all clean, Lily came toddling out in her jammies to find Grandma - her Grandma - snuggling Eli.

I'm not sure who Lily loves more: Eli, or Grandma. So instead of getting jealous, she crawled right up on Grandma's lap and joined in the party. I, of course, couldn't resist the late-afternoon sun flare.

This one is my favorite, because I think it captures the special connection that Mom and Lily seem to have. Those two just get each other, and it's adorable. Maybe that's why Lily wasn't jealous to find Grandma holding Eli; she knows her place in Grandma's heart is secure.

February 7

Today was slow and lovely and just what we needed. I started my morning with my daily handful of pills:

Ibuprofen, Tylenol, antibiotic, probiotics, placenta pills, prenatal multivitamin.

Seriously, I should be the healthiest person in the world right now, or at least the most pain-free. Sadly, that's not the case. But I'm sure we'll get there. 

Eli and I ventured out of the house to somewhere that was not a doctor's office or hospital for the first time; we took a family trip to Target. Chris drove, but Eli and I enjoyed our first ride in the new van. Eli rocked it in his new car seat, and snoozed through Target wrapped on my chest. It was pretty darn easy!

Of course, Eli was totally worn out by the end of the trip.

I realize that all I'm posting are sleeping baby pictures, but all Eli seems to do is sleep. And eat. And then sleep some more. When he is awake - which isn't very often, and doesn't last very long - he looks around with a confused expression. It's quite endearing. I'd be confused, too, if I arrived into the world as early as he did. Heck, I'm still confused by his arrival, but I sure am glad he's here.

Also, please forgive  the crummy cell phone picture, but I witnessed Baby's First "Blue Steel" today. Good job, Eli!

After Target, lunch, then  naps, then Chris and Caleb washed my old car (we're ready to list it for sale - hopefully it goes quickly!), the boys went for a bike ride, I nursed and snuggled Eli, and Chris and Caleb got home just in time to feed Eli a supplementary bottle of pumped breastmilk.

And Lily? She was distracted by my phone.

The girl just wanted to take a few selfies!

February 6

Eli and I had doctor visits again this morning - Eli for a weight check, and me for a recheck of my mastitis.

Eli rocked his appointment, clocking in at 5 lb, 6.5 oz. That's an ounce shy of his birth weight, and up 3.5 ounces from Monday. Pretty impressive, given that he's only been able to nurse on one side!

I, however, did not rock my appointment. My mastitis hasn't gotten worse, but it has only improved veeeery slightly. I'm still in a considerable amount of pain, and the infection is not as severe, but has spread to cover more area. My doc prescribed a new antibiotic (that's #4 now) and an antibiotic ointment. She had me express some milk for a culture, to determine exactly which bacteria is inhabiting my breast. And she sent me to the local hospital for an ultrasound of my breast, to determine whether we were looking at merely clogged milk ducts, or an abscess. 

Luckily, the  radiologist was able to give me results right away: no abscess. So at least I don't have to suffer through the process of having the thing drained. Instead, I have to deal with the pain and infection until the antibiotics do their job. Eli was a champ and slept in his car seat through the whole thing, even though I had to wait more than an hour for my ultrasound. 

Four hours later, we finally made it home. Eli and I were both exhausted, and we collapsed into bed.

This sweet boy spent his whole afternoon sleeping and eating, but I only got to rest for about 30 minutes.

I'm continuing to pump milk from the side with mastitis, and Chris feeds that milk to Eli in a bottle after I've finished feeding him on my good side. Our doctor prescribed a method of bottle feeding that will hopefully keep Eli from preferring a bottle to the breast, and Chris has mastered it. 

Side note: I love that Chris is snuggling Eli, wearing his Jimi Hendrix shirt, because it reminds me of this picture of Chris snuggling brand-new baby Caleb, five and a half years ago.

Whats especially funny is that in this picture, Caleb 8 days old, and Eli is 9 days old today. I love that Jimi has a tradition of photo bombing our family pictures!

February 5

Eli was a week old yesterday, so we figured we should probably get around to giving him his first bath. Since Caleb and Daisy both had school this morning, today was a great time for it. Chris is the official first bath-giver in our family; here is Lily's first bath and Daisy's first bath. Caleb's first bath was in pre-blog days.

Eli was not impressed.

I am just blown away at how tiny Eli is - look at how big Chris' hand is compared to Eli's little head and shoulders! Also, look at how loose that skin is on his upper arm. He definitely needed a few more weeks in utero to fatten up.

All done!

By the time his bath was over, Eli was exhausted.

In addition to having the mama-razzi documenting his first bath, Eli also had fans watching. Lily heard the commotion and insisted on being up with her brother. She tried her best to calm him down.

But no one calms an upset baby like mama does.

There - our sweet, clean little boy.

And his cleaning crew!

Just for comparison, here's Eli's first bath:

Lily's first bath,

Daisy's first bath,

And Caleb's first bath.

Eli is definitely the angriest of the bunch!

Thanks for all of the concern about the mastitis. It's not really improving yet, but I'm hopeful things will turn around soon. Eli sees the doctor tomorrow for a weight check, and she'll check me out, too. Please keep praying for healing for me - I am done with being sick!

February 4

Well. I saw the doctor about my mastitis today. She totally changed course on my treatment, and I'm encouraged that she has a thorough plan of attack to get me back to health. Unfortunately, she says it will take up to a week to get my pain and swelling down. Ugh. Fortunately, my mom was off work today and able to come with me to the appointment, and spend the whole day at my house to help Chris with the kids. We are so blessed to have her!

Mom will probably hate this picture that Chris took of her reading with Lily, but I don't care. I want to document the fact that she was here, and that the kids love having her here. I am so thankful that Mom knows how we do things, and can just slip into our daily life and go with our rhythm. It makes things so much easier.

Caleb was at school, Daisy was napping, and Lily got some quality alone time with Mommy, Daddy, Grandma, and Eli. Here, Lily is sitting on the bed while I nursed Eli, waiting for her turn to hold him.

Finally, she got her turn. She was thrilled!

And because I know everyone wants to watch a minute and a half of Lily playing with her baby, here is a video:

She is just too cute, and Eli is so tolerant of it!

Hopefully tomorrow finds me feeling significantly better. For now, I'm staying in bed and doing nothing but these blog posts.

February 3

Mastitis.

It hit last night, as I was working on the blog. I couldn't get warm, and couldn't figure out why I was so cold. Then I began shaking. My fever rose, and I grew more miserable. Called my midwife. Sent Chris out for cabbage. Called the midwife again. Sent Chris out for antibiotics.  Finally fell asleep. 

Today I had lots of pain, but no more infection symptoms. I tried my hardest to stay in bed all day, so I only managed to take this picture.

Eli is happiest when I wear him, but it's not an option with the mastitis. Ouch. But he sure is sweet snuggled up next to me!

Around 5:00 my fever came back, and began skyrocketing until it reached 104.3. Scary. We got it down, and the midwives called in a prescription for another antibiotic. I am miserable and this is awful. Thankfully, my mom is available to help Chris with the kids, because I am no good. I have an appointment to see our family doc tomorrow, who just happens to be a breastfeeding specialist. I'm hopeful she will have a magic cure for this awful pain.

At this point, I just have to laugh. First my water breaking at 35 weeks, then my labor failing to start, then the pitocin, then nearly to the OR for a c-section, then the epidural and the second epidural because the first didn't work, then two blown IVs, then Eli's poor blood sugar, then Eli's struggles nursing, and now this. I'm ready for things to be easy, but it also makes me so thankful that things were so easy with my other three. I trust that God has a plan, and I trust that he will provide. But right now I'd like the hard stuff to stop, please.

February 2

I am a few days behind on blogging, but I'm hopeful you all will forgive me, given the circumstances. I think my new strategy will be to post for each day, and slowly try to fill in the gaps.

Eli is five days old today. Due to his early arrival and my concerns about breastfeeding a late-term preemie, I scheduled an appointment to check in with our doctor, who is a breastfeeding guru. Before the appointment, I was concerned that while Eli seems to be nursing well, that he may not be nursing efficiently. I was afraid that he might not be getting all of the milk he needed, and that he was jaundiced or not gaining weight.

Our doctor eased most of those concerns. Eli was 5 lb, 7.5 oz at birth, and 5 lb, 4 oz when he left the hospital on day 2. Today he was 5 lb, 3 oz, and my doctor speculated that he had lost all the weight he would lose, and was working his way back up to birth weight. We go back on Friday to check his weight one more time. 

Though Eli has a slight tongue tie, our doctor (who is an expert in this area) declined to correct it today. She thinks that correcting Eli's latch will help with the pain I'm experiencing while nursing. I'll be honest - she showed me a good technique in her office, but at the time it felt awkward and I'm struggling to replicate it at home. But still. She is confident that Eli is getting all of the milk he needs, and so I'm happy with that. 

Otherwise, our little guy is just perfect. We were concerned about jaundice, so on the way home from the appointment Eli and I stopped by the hospital to have his blood bilirubin levels tested.

That's us in the waiting area, with a warming pad on poor Eli's heel. Those heels have been stuck so many times in the past 5 days!

Luckily, his bilirubin levels are totally normal, so we have no cause for concern. Hooray!

In other news, everyone in the family remains in love with Eli.

Chris and Eli snuggled in bed this morning.

(side note: my mom found a few preemie clothing items for Eli, and it's amazing the difference they make! All of the newborn clothes say 5-8 pounds, but my 5-pounder swims in them. I am totally in love with the fact that the preemie clothes actually fit him!!)

Before her afternoon nap, Daisy wanted a chance to hold her brother. It was a rare moment when Caleb was at school and Lily was asleep, and Daisy got to snuggle Eli while I read to her. She was so happy, and the Boppy meant that I was confident she wouldn't drop or jostle Eli too much, so I could step back and take some pictures.

What a good big sister she is!

February 1

Today was the first day with Eli that almost felt normal. Chris took the big kids to church (still in my Camry, because we didn't have time to switch car seats into the new van) while Eli and I stayed home. While the girls napped after lunch, Chris installed Caleb and Daisy's seats in the back of the van. They were SO excited.

SO EXCITED!

Daisy was especially pumped because we chose to finally switch her car seat to forward-facing. Our family doctor recommends waiting until 4 years old to do this, but Daisy turns four in May and I decided we were close enough.

After the seats were in, Chris took the big kids to the grocery store while Lily, Eli, and I napped. Or rather, the kids napped and I was a milk machine. But whatever - my milk has come in and I'm finally less worried about how much Eli is consuming. I will feed that kid all day if he wants me to. After napping/nursing, I wrapped my little man onto my chest to get a few things done.

Isn't he sweet, all snuggled up in there?

Today was Super Bowl Sunday, and I confess: I am pretty uninterested in the Super Bowl, and I positively hate Super Bowl parties. For the past few years, our tradition has been to stay at home, eat snacky foods in front of the TV (two huge treats for our kids!) and put the kids to bed after the halftime show. It works, and so we did it again this year.

We did have a guest this year, though: my sister, Jenny, came over to meet Eli and stayed for the "party".

Here's how we roll:

Jenny was holding Eli when he began fussing. Luckily, Daisy is already an expert at making Eli happy. First, she shushed him.

Then, she lovingly caressed his face. Surprisingly, it worked!

Lily wanted in on that action, so she shushed Eli, too.

The girls examined their brother as he cried. Don't worry - he doesn't always look like a hairy tomato. He was just really upset in that moment.

This is how Eli "watched" the Super Bowl.

Something about this arrangement was really tempting for all of the children. Over the course of the evening, each of them came over to check in on their brother.

"Bay. Babe. Bay-be!"

Lily tries to say "Eli", but the best she can do right now is "Bay-be eye". It's pretty cute.

Caleb and Daisy were most interested when Eli was awake and alert for about 15 minutes. They were fascinated. 

I'm not sure if it's the age, or her temperament, but this girl loves her baby brother.

I know. Sweetest thing ever, right?

Caleb likes to sometimes call Eli by his full name, which I find quite endearing.

And then Daisy decided to read a book to her brother. How sweet is that? I'm hopeful that this is not just a honeymoon phase, but that all three big kids will continue to dote on their brother like they do now. It warms this mama's heart!